1. Things I wish I were doing...
being active outdoors
This I hope to change soon! I am studying for an exam in immunology and pathology. I really want to do well on this bad boy so I am fighting my urge to play outdoors. I have the next few weekends stacked though! Sailing with Dennis and Dr David. Cycling with Amy. Maybe hiking aroud the region...I just have to work hard when it's time to work. That way I can feel good about my playtime, haha.
laughing more
I used to laugh a lot more. What happened to that? Real warm, full sprited laughter is contagious. My mom has that. So do a few of the people I admire most. I find that my laugh carries in the atrium where all the students congregate. I only found that because I think I really laughed for the first time a few days ago. It was weird. I think I will be doing that more often.
taking more photos
Life is beautiful in it's unpredictability. I like to just be and observe things without the need to try to capture it in on a disk. On the other hand, I don't think there is anything wrong with having an image to remember beauty or suprise. I think it can be a memory aid as well as a sign respect for the importance of a moment.
For the otherside of the coin read on...
2. Things I wish I hadn't done...
gone so long without updating this blog
this regular writing exercise is really theraputic. I find myself reflecting on things I do more often to see what is worthy of writing about. Some of the most juicy stuff makes it into my personal journal, sorry peeps.
moved to Bean town (kind of)
I was talking with a recent house guest. He asked why I decided to come to school in Boston. I told him what I tell everyone when I'm asked the same question. A trusted advisor said "I think staying in CA would be easy, Harvard would be a challenge for you. You'd grow alot." My friends, who only want the best for me said "Why settle for anything but the number one school?" So after some thinking I chose to move to Boston. What bothered me most about the decision is that all my life I've been moving. I wanted nothing more than to find a place where I could lay some roots and "settle down". The Bay started to feel that way. Not a day has gone by since June 19, 2009 that I haven't thougth about "what if I stayed..."
let go of what things/people/activities I knew I needed to be happy
As stated above, I've moved around a lot. Before I was 17 years old I had moved more thatn 20 times and attended more than 12 schools. I knew that moving meant leaving the old, bracing for and embracing the new. What I didn't fully grasp was that there come a time in the adult life where you KNOW what you want and need in your life. Like, I know I need to be near the water. I'm very effected by the sun. I'm kind of crunchy (hippy, green, DIYer). I had people that I relied on and didn't want to let the move change that dynamic. I plunged myself into a new situation at a time when I think my ability to rapidly adapt had changed. Don't get me wrong, I'm adapting but MAN it is taking a long time and it's hard. None the less "I come from good stock" as my elders would say and I will perservere.
Link on #2 is "Mistakes" by Immortal Technique from 3rd World Order great album. Like the song, this post wasn't so much a whine about regrets but more of excercise in reflection.
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